the life a year

Philip and I meandered down the highways and byways to Floyd, VA for a weekend. The daffodils reminded us of a year ago. The rain on the highway did too. In a little Creekside Cabin Philip came up with a great game where he thought of a certain title (for example "Some Loves" "Best Hikes" "Some Dislikes" "Favorite Memories"). Under each heading were multiple events, etc. I then ordered. He stayed up until 2.30 am, which I thought was late (a trait that is laughable to Philip - my early nights) to put it all together and shared it over breakfast.

The game helped produce some reflections about out first year.

Questions and Answers after a year of being married:

1. What are some of your favorite memories about the past year of marriage?

P: A camping trip in Fort Valley, swimming at night in the creek, then watched shooting stars laying under the sky together. Betsy along for the first time on a 3n1 trip to Alabama; she learned a great deal about Diech, Micah, and me…and I LOVED having her with us!

B: Philip’s surprise dates which included a great piano concert by Jon Keener. Multiple hours spent reading books out loud to each other. Learning to pray together. Excuses to put my hand on Philip’s leg as we drive. Making meals, especially breakfasts, together. Hosting many wonderful people! Learning to cut (Philip’s) hair. And Dietrich’s once. Great walks down the country roads around our house – at sunset, after dark under innmerable stars.

2. What are some things you have learned about the other person?

P: Betsy is very passionate about her faith and is driven to dig beneath simplistic answers and interpretations. She loves art galleries, concerts, and massages. Betsy loves to laugh and chuckle. She is an incredible hostess, as just about anybody at Early Church could tell you by now! It’s been an awesome year of hosting friends because of Betsy’s love for inviting; she loves it when people around her are healthy and feel safe. Dislikes plastic, cold feet, staying up late, when I talk about how people around me are driving, and anything with high fructose corn syrup.

B: I probably knew a lot of these things before marriage but not to the extent I now know them. A. Philip loves bringing equality to our relationship and empowering me to use my gifts. B. Philip loves basketball! He gets so excited he can hardly eat sometimes before a game. C. Philip loves to cut up vegetables for meals and makes really good pancakes and gourmet eggs for breakfast. D. Philip likes fake syrup instead of real maple syrup. E. Philip doesn’t like to put leftovers away but will happily wash dishes. F. Philip is a lot wittier and a bigger tease than I ever realized before marriage:). G. Philip has opinions about house décor, too. H. Philip is the flexible and joyous person I strive to be.

3. What is a phrase the other person says a lot?

P: Of course my favorite is “I love you Philip Rhodes!” It makes one feel alright about oneself! “I love this house!” Betsy’s dad told me when I asked him if I could marry Betsy, “She’s a very loyal person.” I’ve found that’s true not only about me and other people she loves but also houses she falls in love with. We’ve truly found the ideal spot for our first year of marriage and will both be sad to leave. Also, “I’m really tired.” I’ve come to respect her need for sleep and to enjoy getting a lot more sleep myself in this year. I know I’m a lot healthier because of Betsy. Lots of great sleep, lots of great, healthy food too!

B: I love when Philip begins a phrase with “Shall we…” He will ask about playing games, reading out loud, going on walks, starting on an adventure. I also love to hear him say “Dang...!” “Dang, your beautiful!” is a favorite. Passionate man!

4. One of your favorite hikes this year?

P: There have been so many. Enjoyed warm walks in the wintertime in Alabama—romantic walking through cotton fields! Love the Skyline! Walks down Honey Run watching the sun go down.

B: Some great walks down quiet sunny roads in Alabama. An awesome hike to the top of the mountain behind Sparkling Springs with David and Anita! The excruciating hike to High Knob in three feet of snow the day before Valentine’s Day with two random EMU students. Eating blueberries on a mountain hike in Fort Valley.

5. What books have you read out loud to each other?

P: I read Blue Castle out loud to Betsy in about 3 nights—we couldn’t put it down! :). Hilarious. I enjoyed thinking about my sisters reading the book when I was growing up, though they never let me in to their little “Blue Castle parties” then. (not that I was asking…). Here is our list of books read out loud to each other, roughly in chronological order:

Jayber Crow—Wendell Berry (started on our honeymoon)

Prince Caspian—C.S. Lewis

The Voyage of the Dawn Treader—ditto

The Hobbit—J.R.R. Tolkien

Through Painted Deserts—Donald Miller

Lilith—George MacDonald

Ender’s Game—Orson Scott Card

The Blue Castle—L.M. Montgomery

The Fellowship of the Ring—J.R.R. Tolkien (Philip’s first delve into the series)

The Two Towers—ditto

The Lemon Tree—Sandy Tolan (just started in preparation for Pal/Isr)

B: Blue Castle is one of my favorites although I fell asleep for the last chapter. Philip plodded on and finished one of the best parts!

I like remembering finishing Jayber Crow sitting beside our garden while Philip weeded the peas.

6. What movies have you most enjoyed together?

B: When Philip said he knew the movie I was going to pick because I’ve been so excited about it, I couldn’t think what he was talking about. I thought of The Boy in Striped Pajamas etc. but I finally thought of Brothers Bloom. We have also eagerly finished The Lord of the Rings books in order to watch the movies, The Fellowship of the Ring and The Two Towers. We’ve enjoyed introducing movies from our pasts to the other: The Weight of the World, Fly Away Home from me and Singin’ in the Rain and Les Miserables from Philip, as well as sharing The Scarlet Pimpernel –the incredible coincidence that both of us grew up loving such an obscure movie! Another great memory of watching Penelope with Philip and Casey Fabling, and another of watching Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium with at least eight people crowded around our tiny laptop screen, and finally watching O, Brother where art there? with Anita, Dietrich and Abbey.

P: She got most of ‘em. Next….